February 17th, 2010

entertainment

В эфире утренняя почта. Баян, ставший внезапно практически олимпиадным.

Extreme Temperatures

> +20 - Greeks put on sweaters (if they can find them).

> +15 - Hawaiians turn on the heaters (if they have any).

> +10 - Americans shake, Russians are planting cucumbers.

> +5 - You can see your own breathing. Italian cars don't start. Norwegians
> take a bath. Russians drive with lowered windows.

> 0 - Water freezes in America, in Russia it thickens.

> -5 - French cars don't start)

> -10 - You're planning a vacation to Australia .

> -15 - Your cat insists to sleep in your bed. Norwegians put on sweaters.

> -18 - New York landlords turn on the heaters. Russians make their last
> seasonal picnic.

> -20 - American cars don't start. People in Alaska start wearing
> long-sleeves.

> -25 - German cars don't start. Hawaiians are dead.

> -30 - Politicians start talking about homeless people. Your cat prefers to sleep in your pajamas.

> -35 - Too cold to think. Japanese cars don't start.
>
> -40 - You're planning a 2-week hot tub bath. Swedish cars don't start.
>
> -42 - Transportation stops in Europe . Russians eat ice cream on the
> street.

> -45 - All Greeks are dead. Politicians really start doing something for
> the homeless.

> -50 - Your eyelids start sticking when you blink. In Alaska , people close
> the window in the bathroom.

> -60 - White bears start moving south.

> -70 - Hell freezes over.

> -73 - Finnish special services evacuate Santa Claus from Lapland .
> Russians wear earmuff hats.

> -80 - Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets)
>
> -114 - Ethyl alcohol is freezing. Russians are unhappy.

> -273 - Absolute zero, atomic movement stops. Russians wear boots.

> -295 - 90% of the planet is dead. Russian soccer team becomes the world
> champion.

Во-первых, какого черта. Я и при -25 курю в окно. "Коиба Эсплендидос" при всей своей деликатности вкуса и замечательной душистости закрытый салон машины моментально превращает в газовую камеру, причем достигнутый эффект сохраняется сутками. А печка у "Ситроена" такая, что даже на довольно приличной скорости внешний мороз через полуоткрытое окно особо не ощущается - горячий поток наружу сильнее холодного внутрь.

А во-вторых, почему это один футбол? Есть много летних видов спорта, в которых единственным нашим шансом на успех является полное и окончательное вымораживание оппонентов :)